My dear daughter, Li’l Pepinita, nurturing my love for books, gifted me Alan Alda’s new memoir, Never Have Your Dog Stuffed. Alda isn’t just the actor behind the great Hawkeye Pierce of M.A.S.H., the fellah can scratch out a good line or two. The title of his autobio is brilliant enough, but pales in comparison to the first line of his book, one of the goofiest I’ve ever stumbled across:
“My mother didn’t try to stab my father until I was six, but she must have shown signs of oddness before that…”
Alda’s book shows, page after page, that it takes a cruely bizarre childhood to eventually be nominated for 32 Emmy Awards, write, act, and produce in dozens of movies, and get home in time for dinner. Actors
My favorite chapter so far? Chapter 4, which tells the tale of Alda’s childhood pet that eventually ended up stuffed next to the den fireplace.